Exodus from A2 Continues

First, Ryan Mallett transferred to Arkansas.

Then, Justin Boren left Michigan for the Buckeyes.

Now, just when it seemed things couldn't get worse during a tumultuous off season in Ann Arbor, The Rock is packing up and heading to Michigan State.

"The family values have just gone in the shitter since Rich Rodriguez arrived," said The Rock when reached for comment by the MZone. "He's always yelling, using language like 'Paint the motherfucker!' And that Barwis guy wants people to paint me harder. I didn't sign up for that."

The Rock (no relation to the actor) said he just feels more comfortable next to the MSU "Sparty" statue where he will now be placed. "They do it right up there. They protect Sparty from getting painted before the U-M games. I was taken for granted in A2. Getting painted, two, three times a week."

"Plus, the Sparty statue is as close to a Michigan icon as you can find. They're very similar. Except for the fact that he's a big semi-naked bronze guy and I'm a stone that started out the size of a pebble before 165,872 coats of this goddamn paint over the years."

In response to a story in the MSU student newspaper, WE KAN SPELL AND SHIT, former Michigan head coach Lloyd Carr angrily denied reports that he helped The Rock get his release from Michigan or said there were "good campus icons" in East Lansing.

When reached by the MZone, other Michigan icons The Cube and The Belltower denied they too were thinking of transferring. Even still, Detroit Free Press columnist Drew Sharp claimed The Rock's departure is yet another sign of Michigan's declining status.