If College Football Were Like the Democratic Party...

KEITH JACKSON: "Whoa Nellie! With less than eight minutes to play here in the 1979 Cotton Bowl, it's Houston 34, Notre Dame 12. Who would have expected this?"

KIRK HERBSTREIT: "Certainly not the Joe Montana-led Irish, the team everybody expected to win before the game was played. But with Montana on the bench here in the second half suffering from the flu and hypothermia -- even eating chicken soup to warm up -- this game is over."

LEE CORSO: "Not so fast, my friend. The Irish haven't packed it in yet and are still out there fighting until the final whistle."

KEITH JACKSON: "I gotta tell ya, I think this is bad for college football. Notre Dame is only 8-3 while Houston is 9-2 and ranked 4th. The Irish need to bow out of this game and rally behind the higher ranked Cougars. For the good of the sport."

KIRK HERBSTEIT: "Couldn't agree with you more, Keith. There are less than seven minutes left, a majority of the game has been played and Houston has amassed 34 of the 46 points awarded today. It's almost a mathematical impossibility for Notre Dame to come back--"

LEE CORSO: "Not so fast, my friend. Notre Dame just scored on a 33-yard blocked punt...and now Montana has come off the bench to try the two-point conversion...it's good! 34-20."

KIRK HERBSTREIT: "But Houston is barely competing now. They have their back-ups in and are just running out the clock until this one is over. And it's over."

KEITH JACKSON: "I gotta tell ya, you hit the nail on the head, Kirk. We got ourselves freezing temperatures, ice and 18 to 30 mile per hour winds. Stick a fork in this one because--"

LEE CORSO: "Not so fast, my friend. Montana just drove the Irish 61 yards in 5 plays and threw for another two-point conversion to cut the lead to 34-28 with 4:15 left."

KIRK HERBSTREIT: "See, that's just the kind of divisive thing that illustrates the old way of college football thinking. When a team is up by over 20 points with less than eight minutes left, college football fans want to be able to turn their attention to the next bowl game of the day. To have to watch until the very end disenfranchises fans who want to tune in to the Rose Bowl pre-game show."

KEITH JACKSON: "Whoa Nellie! And Joe Montana fuuuuuuuumbles with 1:50 to play and the Cougars recover. Now hopefully Dan Devine will do the right thing and have his squad bow out gracefully from this game."

LEE CORSO: "Not so fast, my friend! The Cougars went for it on 4th and inches from their own 29 with :28 seconds left and got stuffed! Notre Dame ball! They have one more chance!"

KIRK HERBSTREIT: "And what if they do score? Are you going to take the victory away from Houston and alienate all the fans rooting for the underdog? Fans who only tuned into the Cotton Bowl in the first place to see if little ol' Houston could upset the mighty Fighting Irish?"

KEITH JACKSON: "I gotta tell ya, the bigger problem is what if the Irish do score, but miss the extra point and we end in a tie? Then nobody wins. Then what? Especially after Houston already won the first, second and third quarters. It's going to be chaos."

LEE CORSO: "Last play...Montana rolls right...he's looking for Kris Haines in the corner of the endzone...TOUCHDOWN IRISH! TOUCHDOWN IRISH! Joe Unis lines up for the extra point...it's good! IRISH WIN! Irish win one of the greatest comebacks in college football history!"

KIRK HERBSTREIT: "I'm so disgusted by the underhanded way Notre Dame pulled this out, I'm never watching college football again."

KEITH JACKSON: "I gotta tell ya, I'm sitting the rest of the bowl season out and will only call college basketball now."